Everything
by letherfly
Summary: Post Her Negotiation. "I'm okay, I'm okay…" she continued her mantra.


_you calm the storms_

_and you give me rest_

_you hold me in your hands_

_you won't let me fall_

_you steal my heart_

_and you take my breath away_

Fin had led her to the awaiting ambulance and helped her inside. She hadn't fought him when he jumped inside and sat behind her and gently touched the top of her head. The warm touch of someone who loved and cared for her helped her focus. She kept her eyes focused on the ceiling of the bus, trying to silently calm her fleeting thoughts and memories. The EMT's were a flurry of hands and tools and questions that she struggled to remain focused on.

"I'm okay," she murmured as they took her blood pressure. "I'm okay, I'm okay…"

Fin's hand found her shoulder and squeezed lightly, trying to comfort her and not jar any unseen injuries beneath her shirt.

"You're just fine baby girl," he assured her.

Her mind was spinning; she was in the house and then she was beating him and now she was being whisked away. She could hear the muffled sound of sirens and it struck her: they were _her_ sirens. The sirens weren't just from the ambulance, she could hear echoes of different pitches and patterns of the familiar roar. She knew the screaming sirens were an escort for her, to get her medical treatment immediately. The atmosphere was somber and strangely cold around her. The world was sobering up and she could feel the dull ache take over her body.

"Fin, I need your phone," she asked weakly. He was quick to get his phone into her hand, reaching over her shoulder to help her navigate to the dial pad. She dialed a number she knew by heart and sucked in a deep breath.

The first ring cut off quickly.

"Liv?" His raspy voice was shrill with anticipation and fear; his body betrayed him and he couldn't control his voice. The sound of her name on his lips laced with fear hit her in the chest hard and fast forcing her to exhale fast and hard.

She held back a sob and swallowed hard. Now wasn't the time to lose it.

"I'm okay," she whispered before her voice cracked and she couldn't choke back a sob.

"Liv, oh god… Olivia, god I love you. You hear me? I love you," he couldn't hold back now, he was falling apart. She nodded in agreement as the sobs wracked her body. They fell apart together, neither able to continue speaking.

After a moment, Fin gently took the phone from her.

"Brian, it's Fin, she's okay, she's stable. We're going to transport her back to the city, we should be at Mercy within the hour," he paused and listened for a moment, "I'll tell her, we'll see you there, man."

Fin hung up and moved to sit by Olivia's side.

"He says he loves you. You know I have to kick his ass if he hurts you, right?" His tough exterior had returned. His words caught her off guard and a small laugh slipped from her lips despite her tears.

"I know, Fin," she replied.

_you are the light that's leading me _

_to the place where I find peace again_

The chaos and spinning world came back as soon as the ambulance stopped. As they pushed her into the emergency room her eyes were frantically scanning for Brian. Her heart beat faster as the faces became a blur as the gurney wheeled on.

They entered a room off a quiet hallway and helped Olivia off the gurney and onto a bed. The nurses began taking her vitals and cutting at her clothes. That's when she heard his voice; frantic and exhausted asking to see her. Her heart slowed and swelled; he _was_ in love with her.

"That guy out there that's yelling is my boyfriend, can you please go get him?" she asked the nurse who was trying to take her pulse. The nurse set her hand back down and nodded.

The world slowed when he entered the room, she wanted to get up and run to him and hold on for dear life. The pain and trauma of the past four days had caught up and she couldn't get up. He was at her side in an instant with tears running down his cheeks. Her hand found his and she pulled him to her, breathing in his familiar scent, needing to feel his comfort. She didn't care that she was crying again or that she was breaking all her own rules.

She was a changed person and she didn't care; the only thing she needed was his comfort.

"I love you, too," she managed. "I'm okay, I'm okay…" she continued her mantra.

_And how can I stand here with you_

_and not be moved by you_

The nurses were quick to usher Brian back to the waiting room where he remained for the next several hours. The older nurse with dark hair was empathetic to the situation and came out often to give Brian updates. Her squad had stayed with Brian until just after eleven o'clock. Amanda dragged her feet when the rest of the squad headed home. She offered to stay until Brian could see Olivia, but he declined and told her to get some rest and promised to call her in the morning with an update.

When it was just him in the small waiting room, he felt anxiety tighten in his chest and the tears prick at the back of his eyes. He got up and started walking down the hall, his eyes never leaving sight of her door. When he got too far, he turned back and repeated the walk.

Brian was well into his pacing pattern when the nurse re-appeared. He sprinted down the hall to meet her, fear rising up in his chest.

"Is she okay?"

"Yes, she's doing fine. We're going to give her something to help her sleep, but she wants to see you first," the woman explained as she grabbed Brian's arm and lead him back into Olivia's room.

"Olivia, I'll be back in a little while with something to help you rest," the nurse advised quietly.

Brian pulled a chair up to her bedside and carefully took her good hand in his. She smiled weakly as he kissed he fingers.

"I missed you," she whispered.

"I missed you, too," he replied.

"I was so scared, Bri."

"I was scared too, babe. I'm going to be right here. I'm not leaving. We're going to get you through this. You're going to be okay," his voice was strong and confident. He knew that he couldn't break down again; he had to be strong for her.

"Will you stay with me tonight?" She was breaking her own rules again. She considered this as the words slipped from her lips; the old Olivia Benson would see this as weakness. She now saw it as strength; she was already starting to reach out and accept support when she needed it most.

"Of course, Liv."

She used what strength was left her weary body to scoot to the opposite side of the bed. Brian kicked his sneakers off and sat down next to her, watching her closely to make sure he wasn't causing her discomfort. He leaned back into the pillows and watched as she curled into his side. They stayed quiet, waiting for the nurse to return with Olivia's medications. Brian was careful with her battered and bruised body; he let his finger graze across her bare arms in lazy circles.

The nurse arrived with the sleeping pills and Olivia took them gratefully. The nurse took extra care to close the curtains and turn off all the lights for them.

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

"I'm okay, Bri. I'm going to be okay," her chant continued, though soft and fading.

_you're all I want_

_you're all I need _

_you're everything_


End file.
